Talitha Ndima on being a mother in the Showmax film Ndingowakho

SAFTA nominee Talitha Ndima (Soft Life, The Bantu Hour) masterfully captures the love and complexities of a mother-daughter relationship in the Showmax Original Ndingowakho, premiering on 12 April following its successful debut at the Joburg Film Festival last month.

Watch the trailer for Ndingowakho

In an exclusive interview, Sanelisiwe Mhlati speaks with Talitha about playing Phindi, navigating themes of family and ambition, and the emotional depth required to portray such powerful relationships.

Phindi is a mother caught between her own life and the responsibilities of being a mother to her estranged daughter. How did you approach portraying a character with such complex emotions?

The first thing was to not judge the character because that is a sure way to misrepresent a character.  Then I made sure that I made up good reasons as to why she is the way she is so I could justify her actions.

Did you relate to the complexity of a mother-daughter relationship, and did any of your personal experiences influence how you played Phindi?

As a daughter, I could definitely relate to how complex the relationship can be between a mother and her daughter.  It is always a good idea to lean into personal experiences as an actor so as to root your performances in reality as much as possible.

Phindi’s a loving but tough mom. Do you see any parts of yourself in her, or is playing her a whole new challenge for you?

I completely believe in humans being more than just one thing. We all have a duplicity that we allow some people to see and others not so much. As a result, it was a pleasure to play someone who had different sides that were visible.

It looked like Lunga was the hill you were willing to die on. Any advice for parents that are struggling to balance parenthood and their love lives?

I would say that it is possible to strive for romantic love and fulfill one’s role as a parent and one just needs to find a healthy balance between those two needs. If the partner you are with truly loves you, they will be able to encourage you in your pursuit of balance between the two roles.

Looking back at your experience playing Phindi, what’s one key takeaway you’ll carry with you, both as an actress and as a person?  

We can all have more than one thing in our lives that is important to us, but we can strive hard to have a balance between those things in order to fulfill all the needs that we have.

Phindi is also chasing career goals. Have you ever had to balance your own personal ambitions with family demands? What’s your secret to managing it all?

I have had to miss some family events because of work, which is heartbreaking to say the least. But I think the more mature I became, the easier it was to determine the importance of certain things. So I became less afraid to say no to other things that I deemed less important.

The word “Ndingowakho” means “I am yours.” What does that phrase mean to you by the end of the story?

No matter what has happened between the two characters, Thandi will always be Phindi’s daughter.

The film explores themes of love, family, reconciliation, and healing. What do you hope audiences take away from your journey with Thandi?

The love of a mother is unlike any other. As difficult as that relationship can be, it is always worth it to work at it as it is also the most fulfilling.

I hope that the audience can see the complexity of love and how it manifests itself in different ways and gain a different perspective of how to possibly understand the next person.

Stream Ndingowakho only on Showmax, from 12 April 2025.