Tshepo Miya talks about being on Married at First Sight

Married at First Sight South Africa has been on air for eight weeks, and the drama hasn’t let up. Every week, something unexpected happens that leaves viewers stunned and the most explosive moments are still on the way.

Airing every Sunday at 6:30PM on Mzansi Magic and streaming on Showmax, this season introduces a brand-new panel of experts and singles who have agreed to marry complete strangers.

The couples taking part in this daring social experiment are Palesa Mphaki and Tshepo Miya, Makoto Phumodi and Nkuleleko Mahlangu, Themba Khosa and Nelisa Ntabeni, and Portia Baloyi and Bongani Luvalo.

Now legally married, the couples are navigating married life in real time – and it’s been a rollercoaster. Viewers have watched them face everything from disapproving families and unresolved baby mama drama to growing intimacy issues. It’s been raw, real, and at times, very uncomfortable.

In the latest episode, emotions ran high. We learned about the heartbreaking passing of Portia’s father, tensions between Tshepo and Makoto reached a boiling point, and things got even messier between Themba and Nelisa.

We recently caught up with Tshepo, who gave us the tea on his time on the show, his wife and more. 

What made you decide to join the show?

I joined the show because my traditional way of starting relationships had not worked and I thought this would be an ideal way to see what is out there for me. 

What went through your mind when you first saw Palesa?

There were so many things that went through my mind; however, I was hopeful.

How did you prepare yourself mentally for this experiment?

One can never be fully prepared for such an experiment, you need to take it as it comes, but I did have a long conversation with my therapist ahead of time just to make sure that I am doing this.

What advice did your therapist give you? 

My therapist advised me that shows like this will bring about different people and you should always remember what you can be in control of and leave the things you cannot control.

When did you first notice cracks in your marriage?

The cracks in my marriage began during the honeymoon phase when my wife asked me not to communicate directly with women in production, and said I should rather redirect them to her for any information or requirements. I found that strange as we were still getting to know each other and that kind of behaviour did raise some eyebrows.

Palesa Mphaki on Married at First Sight S2 on Showmax

Viewers have seen both highs and lows in your marriage over the past two weeks. What do you think caused the conflict?

Our conflict came from that front of camera image that we or I was supposed to adhere to, as I explained in a previous episode. During the day, outside of shooting, there were issues that I would raise, but I would be told by my wife that we need to “nip them in the bud” and ensure we appear okay as much as possible. My issue is that I cannot pretend – if I’m not okay, then I am not okay.

What exactly is the issue between you and Makoto?

My issue with Makoto came from a few off-screen runs ins and it mostly came from the conflict she had with Nkululeko. I have never wanted to surround myself with unruly people who, even around other people, are able to just say whatever they want, without showing some kind of respect – not only for their partner, but for us as well.

What has this experience taught you about yourself?

I have learnt that I have tougher skin than I initially thought. This has taught me that people will always form some kind of opinion about you, good or bad, and that the only thing you can do is to continue showing up as yourself and continue being the best version to those who wish to experience you in person.

What has it been like watching yourself on TV?

Watching myself on TV has come with some mixed emotions, honestly, and while I have taken a lot of online bullying and assumptions, I am comforted by those who know me, including the support from the gents. It’s been an amazing brotherhood that we have developed, it has helped each of us navigate through some really hard episodes each week and I never take that for granted.

How are things between you and the rest of the cast?

You have to watch the show to see how things are between my wife and myself, but the “husbands”, as we have dubbed ourselves, have been there for one another since the bachelor party. We have been a great outlet for each one of us, the brotherhood that has come from that has been incredible, and I appreciate that.  

What advice do you have for anyone who wants to join the show next season?

The advice I would give any hopeful who wants to join the show is to be prepared for anything. Not all that glitters is gold – the pressure of the show, the schedule, your time and your entire life will be hung out to dry, so do it for the right reasons, trust your gut instincts and never depart from who you are.