By Gen Terblanche13 December 2024
How Joey takes a wrecking ball to The Bachelor
Look out, losers, there’s a new Bachelor in town. This 28-year-old tennis coach, who looks like a lost Jonas brother, claims to be looking for his “next doubles partner.” But along with the cheese, he’s serving up something unexpected: class.
Joey Graziadei should have low-effort Bachelor wannabes shaking in their loafers. He demonstrates the difference between self-respect and arrogance, and between being nice and being wallpaper. He doesn’t seem to be there for some kind of smirky self-promotion. And best of all, he acts like he genuinely enjoys being around the Bachelorettes.
Joey seems to have thrown himself in the Bachelor “journey” with an open heart and mind. And as a result, the dates are fun again. The rose ceremonies stakes are higher (no lady is walking out on this Bachelor in disgust). And we’re genuinely invested in who he’ll pick.
Here are just five of the factors that would make us consider taking Joey home to grandma for treats.
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Binge The Bachelor Season 28 now. And for Bachelor Nation, Africa, also check out Nairobi Bachelor. New episodes air Fridays on Showmax.
1. He’s not out here to prove his masculinity
Joey comes across as someone who’s secure in who he is from the first episode, when one cheeky Bachelorette presents him with three different sized bananas during her Limo Entrance and asks him which one he “resonates with.” Joey picks the middle sized banana and quips, “We’re not going to go crazy”.
He can make gnocchi from scratch. He wears pink suits because he looks good in them. He dances in a way that suggests he considers it as a skill worth learning – this was backed up when he won Dancing With the Stars Season 33 this November – rather than moving like a space cockroach wearing a human skin. And as it happens, enjoying things that women also enjoy makes him a lot of fun to be around!
He also comes across as open and honest in his confessionals, whether he’s crying over his confused emotions, or admitting that he’s afraid of not finding love and having to leave the show alone. And what does that mean for the Bachelorettes? Well, perhaps unlike more macho offerings, he won’t equate showing emotions with losing his “man card”. And the fact that he can openly and honestly show what he’s feeling will give the Bachelorettes a secure idea of where they stand with him. So Joey is someone they can trust, even when things go wrong – like when one Bachelorette gets injured during their date and Joey calmly insists they get help, then accompanies her to the hospital without hesitation, providing a caring and supportive presence.
2. He’s a fun date
Begone, sleazy charm and Casanova tactics. Joey isn’t here to seduce and bamboozle. He just seems to want to find something worth appreciating and exploring in each of the Bachelorettes in a way that doesn’t seem fake, starting with matching the date activity to an interest she has expressed. And the production crew help him along by pulling out the stops to make the dates real adventures, from flamenco dancing and riding Vespas in Spain, to Joey riding a horse for the first time in his life in Canada.
Joey wants to know the Bachelorettes better and treats dating like an opportunity for doing that, while still keeping things light and fun – but not fun in a class clown way where he’s capering for attention. You’ll often catch Joey verbally checking in with his date to make sure that she’s comfortable and having a good time. He even finds a way to break the ice during his first “Bootcamp” group date by putting his shirt back on for modesty’s sake! In fact, one of Joey’s greatest tactics for keeping things light is to laugh about himself first, which often makes his dates feel less self-conscious. So it’s easy to forgive him for his mistakes, like confusing true crime sensation Gypsy Rose Blanchard with the late judge Ruth Bader Ginsburg.
3. He’s a listener
Watch the Bachelorettes open up, trauma dump, and cry on his shoulder. No matter what they say or do, Joey comes across as a supporter rather than a judger. He asks follow-up questions, and he repeats information to make sure he’s understanding correctly. Joey has been in their shoes on The Bachelorette (he was Charity Lawson’s runner-up in Season 20). And he seems to have learned from that how to respect each person’s time with him, and to give them his full attention. You’d think that was part of the deal for this show, but alas, you’d be sorely mistaken.
Now what happens when you actually pay attention? You spot the real story. So when Joey is on a Two-On-One Date during which one Bachelorette tries to paint the other as “the villain”, Joey spots the real troublemaker and nips her rose in the bud. It’s a Bachelor revolution!
His emotional maturity and willingness to listen also prove useful during the Hometown Dates, when Joey shows he can handle parents’ doubts about him and the Bachelor process, with grace and respect.
4. Love means something to him
Joey has fun on the dates, and he brings the women along for the joyride. But he’s not into cheap thrills. The kisses are kept on an exploratory level. And the flirtation is sweet rather than sultry. Joey also doesn’t try to win over his Bachelorettes by overpromising or love bombing them. In fact, there’s only one woman in the whole season who gets a real “I love you”. Yes there are variations of “I’m falling for you”, but only one declarative statement – unlike Clayton Echard (The Bachelor Season 26), who said it to three different women in his season.
Kiss-’n-tell Clayton also gets a boo-hiss for blabbing about who went all the way with him during his Bachelor Fantasy Suite overnight dates. In contrast, Joey keeps his end-game in sight, later revealing that he “just tried to be aware that I was going to hopefully be watching this back with my forever person,” and that meant only making decisions he could stand by and explain confidently.
5. He doesn’t treat The Bachelor as an all-you-can-gorge-on buffet
We’ve had Colton Underwood (The Bachelor Season 23), who was outspoken about the value of virginity in his season, only to come out as gay in April 2021. And in the opposite direction, Peter Weber’s (The Bachelor Season 24) commitment issues became legendary after he dated and dumped his Bachelor fiancée, then the runner-up, then the fifth-placed Bachelorette from his season, only to have Hannah Brown (The Bachelorette Season 15, which was Peter’s first season) then reveal in her tell-all book, God Bless This Mess, that she and Peter were also seeing each other while his season was first airing.
PS: In November 2024, Peter shocked the Bachelor Nation by dating someone from The Bachelor Season 28 (that’s right, Joey’s season).
Still a doubter and a pouter? The biggest shocker might come in the season wrap-up, After the Final Rose, nobody has a bad word to say about Joey. That’s right, the guy who told 31 women he wasn’t that into them managed to do so without making enemies.
As a reminder of just how badly this can go, remember that Juan Pablo Galavis (The Bachelor Season 10) did everything from throwing literal poop at women, to yapping about how “horny” he was when they wanted to talk, to slut shaming, to policing what they ate, to telling one of his final Bachelorettes, “I loved f****** you, but I don’t know you”. And he ended his season by refusing to put the ring on his final, chosen, Bachelorette’s finger because he didn’t feel that he knew her well enough to marry her (yes, well, that happens when you make no effort to talk to women as if they’re people) – as if the entire premise of the show had somehow escaped him. The only winner of that season was opera singer Sharleen Joynt, who self-eliminated, claiming that she felt no mental connection to Juan Pablo at all.
Binge The Bachelor Season 28 now. And for Bachelor Nation, Africa, also check out Nairobi Bachelor. New episodes air Fridays on Showmax.
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